Sacred Union and “Soulmates” – I often find that it is controversial to talk about ‘soulmates’ within the spiritual world, as it is often viewed as ‘wrong and unspiritual’ to seek anything outside of yourself, or to feel incomplete in any way.
Yet one of the deepest journeys I have been on is rediscovering this foundational longing to bond and merge and connect, and all the ways I have shut this down to fit in with a culture that fiercely promotes “independence”. Opening to interconnection, and the qualities of natural dependence it brings, can be terrifying and overwhelming.
As a single woman and ‘career girl’ for over a decade, who had a successful job, owned my own house, travelled alone and didn’t ‘need’ anyone, marriage was quite an adjustment.
Riane Eisler talks about this subject in her brilliant book Sacred Pleasure, describing how the feminine dimension of experience such as needs, dependence, nurturing, connectivity, and bonding is ruthlessly devalued to promote hyper-masculine concepts of independence, fearlessnes, not needing, and self-containment. This bias filters all the way down into our psychological systems and our spiritual systems, wether we are consciousnes of it or not.
This unconscious, yet dangerous bias, is at the root of many of the ills of the world today – we are not taught to value or experience mutual relationship, or fully understand or respect our deep inter-dependency with earth, or others.
The magnitude of this was brought home to me as I began to explore the actual structure of our psychology and biology, a knowledge often sadly missing in some spiritual circles. Through explorations with Azra Bertrand, who has studied the human psycho-bio-energetic system of the human for many years, and was involved in primary research at the NIH on mother-baby bonding and its impact on the endocrine system, I came to understand the devestating consequence of dimishing the realities of the feminine dimension of Earth.
When we deny the true needs of our body, heart and soul, our psyche fragments and develops defence structures that are not rooted in reality. Our body’s healthy mechanisms of healing and happiness start to break down and self-destruct. Collectively this is also now happening to us as a species, as our mass ‘defense structres of distraction’ begin to threaten the deep-feminine ecosystem system of earth.
In our book Womb Awakening we also explore these issues and delve into a feminine-centric approach to modern sacred relationship with our beloveds, and with earth itself.
We highlight the importance of holding open our hearts for the possibility of a ‘soulmate’ – literally, the ‘mate or twin’ of our soul. The person (male or female) who complements us, and holds us in love so we can dismantle any damaging defense structrues and come back to our vulnerable heart; the lover who brings us back down to the realm of earth – with all its complexities, challenges and primal beauty.
To meet and merge with our ‘soulmate’ – we also have to discover, explore and awaken our own inner soul. Because how can our true soul meet its ‘mate’ – if it we have lived our lives without really knowing our own depths and desires and potential, and without embodying our own soul power?
Ultimately, we are “twinned” with everything. Try going for one moment without food, water, oxygen, gravity, light, heat, shelter and a multitude of other important biological factors that we are not even aware of, at our own peril. And these are just the obvious physical examples, for our soul biology also needs love, connection, touch, listening, holding, beauty, elemntal infusions, moonlight, and the subtle energies transmitting from the cosmos and the earth womb.
This is a realm of Soulmate Magic….calling us home.
By Seren Bertrand, co-founder of The Fountain of Life
Book Release: Womb Awakening – Initiatory Wisdom From the Creatrix of All Life, available from all good booksellers and online retailers such as Amazon